Hah! There's an awesome side-story waiting in there of some intrepid investigative reporter who somehow managed to finagle his way into an Illuminati meeting. Hah! Just wait until his editor gets a load of this. He's sure there's going to be plotting and conspiracies and maybe he'll finally learn what happened to Amelia Earhart... but once he's actually at the meeting it's this huge family reunion with people tracing their genealogies and bragging about their kids. Sure there's some illegal activities but it's all about doing family a favor rather than any big conspiracy. And it probably turned out that he didn't manage to steal an invitation after all, he was set-up because someone was sure he would be the perfect boyfriend for their cousin's daughter. Then they really do fall in love and suddenly he finds that he really is part of the family and what's he going to do now? What in the world will he tell his editor?

Methos, meanwhile, has hidden all of his journals on a distant planet and thinks that they're perfectly safe. Of course, the planet isn't quite deserted enough, because SGC stumble upon the cache, Daniel is ecstatic about this amazing historical find, and the entire sociology department of the SGC reads them, which leaks to the Watchers, and Methos does a complete headplant when some Watcher very excitedly tells Adam Pierson all about this new discover!